Woah now

I was reading Matthew, and I had a "woah now" moment. In chapter 16:18 it says

"And I tell you, you are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of Hades will not prevail against it."

Most people know that. Peter is the rock. Can you smell what the rock is cooking? Jokes (for those of you who don't know where that's from...no worries).
BUT 5 little verses later - only 5 verses, it says...

"But he turned and said to Peter, "Get behind me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to me; for you are setting your mind not on divine things but on human things."

Woah now. Isn't that interesting? Jesus is like - dude, you're the man, then like five seconds later when Jesus tells his crew that he's going to have to die, Peter puts up a stink about it, trying to tell Jesus to back down. Now I can identify with Peter in many ways. First off, I too have a fickle heart. Super happy and joyous one day, then another day grumpy and tired - I think we can all relate, despite our best efforts to remain consistent. But I would probably also be up in arms about my Saviour telling me that He has to die.
I personally think that stories like this aren't in the bible so we can roll our eyes at Peter and say "man, how could he have been so stupid". I think they are there to show us how human we are. Just like Thomas - "Doubting Thomas". Eveyone always talks about silly 'ol doubting Thomas, but I think most of them probably were doubting and Thomas was the only one to have the guts to say anything about it.
People are people. All have sinned and fall short of the Glory of God. Pastors, fathers, mothers, friends, husbands, wives, we are all equal in the sight of God and we are all humans - humans that can mess things up. Peter, who was very succesfull (replace Peter with anyone that you highly respect as a Christian) can easily lose sight of what is Heaven bound.
So... I encourage you! Don't beat yourself up because you make mistakes - you are not God! Get up, shake off the dust and move forward. There's so much JOY that the Lord has, so use it up. The whole "woe is me" needs to be taken out with the trash. Get excited about Emmanuel - GOD IS WITH US. Woohoo! I am happy that my Saviour loves me and is here. That He doesn't abandon me when he sees my plethera of faults, so I might as well get real with Him and be honest :P
Be blessed my friends.

The Language of LOVE

Last night I had a wonderful evening. Prayer walking was really cool - we covered twice as much territory as usual. Praise the Lord! Afterward I went for some coffee with some of my girls (ahem, women-friends - Achlai! haha) We had a really good chat about our love languages. For those of you who have never heard of this notion before, it's basically 5 different ways that you can receive love (I can't remember the name of the author...)

The five languages of love are
1)Quality time
2)Gifts
3)Acts of Service
4)Affection
5)Words of Affirmation.

There were 5 of us together and sharing how we receive love differently. I really appreciated learning how I can love my friends better. Because not everyone receives love in the same way. For example one of the love languages that I value a lot is affection. I have a friend, and whenever I saw her and was talking to her, I'd have my hand on her shoulder, or give her hugs or high five's etc. Because that's one of the big ways that I receive love. Turns out my friend is not a big fan of affection, so while I thought that i was really showing love to her, she clearly wasn't receiving it in the same way that I intended. Haha. You know who you are :) So it is good to talk about these things. So in good ol Tim Hortons we each listed these languages from the ones highest on our value system to lowest.

The wise Achlai Ernest also had a revelation of the fact that whatever our highest love language is, that is also the way that we can get hurt the most. Example: If my highest love language is words of affirmation, then if someone cuts me down with harsh words, it will affect me more than someone else that's highest love language is acts of service. For them it would be more severe if someone just stopped doing dishes or laundry or pitching in on their share of the work. Another interesting point we shared about was that once you find out what someone's highest love language is, then whenever they love you in that way, you know that they really care. For example, my lowest love language (although I do appreciate this) is acts of service. If someone cooks a meal for me, that's really nice and I do appreciate it, but I value the other love languages more. BUT if let's say Mary's no. 1 love language is acts of service and she cooks me a meal, I know that she must care a lot about me. Does that make sense?
Anyway, all this to say that I think that it's important to know how your friends and family and special ones in your life ;) receive love, so that you can love them in a way that they will receive it well.

In case anyone is interested, for this season of my life at least, I think that my order is...
1)Words of Affirmation 2)Affection 3)Quality Time 4)Gifts 5)Acts of Service

Little challenge for anyone who is up for it - think of the ways your receive love and share it. I'd LOVE to know. Hahaha

Food for my Soul

In the past few days, I've had friends encourage me with scripture and prayer, and I just wanted to share some of the scriptures with you. Although these passages are familiar, God always reveals new things to you as you read them, while at different stages of your life. Be blessed as you read...

Psalm 23
The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
he restores my soul.
He guides me in paths of righteousness
for his name's sake.
Even though I walk
through the valley of the shadow of death, [a]
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.
Surely goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
forever.

Psalm 40:1-5
I waited patiently for the LORD ;
he turned to me and heard my cry.
He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
out of the mud and mire;
he set my feet on a rock
and gave me a firm place to stand.
He put a new song in my mouth,
a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear
and put their trust in the LORD.
Blessed is the man
who makes the LORD his trust,
who does not look to the proud,
to those who turn aside to false gods.
Many, O LORD my God,
are the wonders you have done.
The things you planned for us
no one can recount to you;
were I to speak and tell of them,
they would be too many to declare.

laughter to break the silence

Some of you may know, others may not, that I have been going through a rough time lately. But I love how God, in the midst or storms can brighten up your day with some humor.

I am still reading through Genesis (it's a long book!) because I am following the one year bible...anyway, something that I found funny were two passages


And Esau ran to meet him, and embraced him, and fell on his neck, and kissed him: and they wept.
Genesis 33:4

And he fell upon his brother Benjamin's neck, and wept; and Benjamin wept upon his neck.
Genesis 45:14


Now I know that this is just a problem with the english language, but when you read this as the 'faling on his neck' as the same person, it can put a funny image in your mind. I mean, it would be very hard to fall on your own neck - quite awkward, considering your neck is protected by your shoulders width as well as you head.... something that made me laugh.

Just some thoughts...

This is me and Juwa last week, and that is chilli for those wondering. Love you Juwa!!! 

The cost to follow

This afternoon I was playing a great old Salvation Army tune that my parents actually recorded a few years back at Thanksgiving for fun. The song is called "If Crosses Come"
and as I was listening to it, tears welled up in my eyes...

If crosses come, if it should cost me dearly
To be the servant of my Servant Lord
If darkness falls along the path of duty
And men despise the Saviour I adore

I'll not turn back, whatever it may cost
I'm going to live to seek and save the lost
I'll not turn back, whatever it may cost
I'm going to live to seek and save the lost

If tears should fall, if I am called to suffer
If all I've loved man should deface
I'll not deny the One that I have followed
Or be ashamed to bear my Master's name

Wow...isn't that so amazing. I think that the Western church (generally) has lost its audacity, doesn't have the balls it used to (sorry if that's offensive, but that's the way I'd say it to anyone I was talking to).

I want to rise up as a warrior. A WARRIOR!!!

In Blue Like Jazz (one of my fav books) Donald miller says...

"... We sat around one night with pen and paper and offered sacrifices, each of us trying to outman the other with bigger and brighter lambs for the slaughter...we were manning up to Jesus, bumping Him chest to chest as it were, like Bible salesmen on steroids."

George Verwer said once "We are called to be fisher's of MEN, not keepers of the aquarium"

I want to be a warrior, someone who doesn't remain within the walls of my church everyday of the week. Not someone who tries to out-sacrifice, out-discipline, out-fast, or whatever it may be to proove me more worthy. Because we all know none of us are worthy. BUT we can fight. And we must fight - together.

I hope that this stirs your hearts. I had a conversation with a good friend of mine recently and we were talking about love, and the difference between fluffy love and real love is that real love can hurt at times, because it breaks throuhgh the numbness. So I don't care if I am a trouble maker in the church (as in the body) as long as I am following Christ, then - I'll not turn back.

Montreal - je t'aime

Amazing. God is amazing.
Tonight I did prayer walking in my beautiful city. Praise the Lord! (heehee Emilie you should be used to me saying that in a high pitched voice).
God is out of this world.
We were small in numbers, but to be perfectly honest, that didn't bother me at all. I could have had one hundred people show up, but if none of them were really excited about what God is doing and will do for our city, then three is enough - and it was.
It is such a different experience to walk and pray, because we would pass by somebody and just start to pray for them, or by a certain building, or area, that if we were stuck in a house or church, probably would not have thought to pray for. So that was cool thing #1.
Cool thing #2 was that we were bringing light into dark places. We were walking down Redpath from Dr. Penfield towards Sherbrooke and I started praying that these sparks that we are setting in these streets would start to fan into flame. That where are feet were walking, the Holy Spirit would stay. That the streets are better lit (don't mean to sound cheesy, but honestly, it is not some strange metaphor - Jesus IS the light...I digress) because we went there.
Don't take me wrong - I am not blowing my own horn, and congratulating myself for being a 'super Christian' or anything like that at all. I just think that it's AMAZING that I get to be a part of it. That God, who is Supreme and Sovereign can allow me to be a part of His great plan...it blows my mind.
Cool thing #3 - God speaks to me a lot through visual things, whether that be visions, or images he puts in my mind, or by actually seeing something, and then supernaturally seeing it. For example - we were at the upper part of the mountain and we could see the city sky line as we were walking, and that image started helping me to direct my prayers. I was seeing (not like literally, as in having a delusion, but seeing it spiritually) and praying the Holy Spirit to start rushing down the mountain an into the homes, into different areas and flood them with His presence.
There are many other cool things that happend, but those we just a few that I wanted to share.
Be blessed. Thanks for all of those who are praying and did pray. I am calling and will continue to call the leaders of Montreal to rise up, and join this army of believers who will change the face of this planet, starting with changing our own hearts. Pray BIG!
Your fellow warrior on the winning side,
Kirsten

This is a shot from Thanksgiving (it strange being the only kid from my family there, but we had an AMAZING time playing Kir-Plunk! I was so awesome at it. heehee) 

My crazy little bro (his hair is much more ridiculous now) 

This is me and my fam jammin' this summer. Great time of worship!  

Now for something COMPLETELY different

I was reading from Genesis the other day, and came across the infamous creation story, but something struck me as quite funny actually. Read this passage

The Lord God said to the serpent, "Because you have done this, cursed are you among animals and among all wild creatures; upon your belly you shall go, and dust you shall eat all the days of your life..." Genesis 3:14

So if God cursed the serpent after Adam and Eve sinned, and now the serpent shall be upon [its] belly, then my question is... how did the serpent get around before that day? Did he bounce on his tail???

Just some thoughts :)

tying to make some sense

I have been purposely not writting blogs the past couple of days. I have definately had so much to write, but I find it hard to articulate what I am feeling. Rather than putting it off to try and think of some cute and clever way of putting it, I will humbly (*new years resolution!) try to make some sense of what I've been thinking.

I am now beginning to see that I have been wrong for so long about what church is, who Jesus is, and where I stand in my relationship with Him...

It's funny, because I know that everything happens for a reason, and I know that I was honestly doing what I thought was right for so long, so it's not that I regret where I came from (the lifestyle I've been living) - on the contrary! I am thankfull that I went through what I had to go through in order to end up where I am.

So...where am I? I am at a place where I am recognizing that I am messed up, that I don't have all the answers and that I am far from being perfect. Yes, I did know this before, so let me try to clarify a bit. I honestly didn't think that I was doing this, but I was living my life with a goal of comfort. As much as I knew that "trials will come" I saw them more as obstacles on the way to a GREAT and COMFORTABLE life. I patted myself on the shoulder when I volunteered at soup kitchens, I welcomed the praise after returning from a short term mission trip, blah, blah, blah. I was living, "knowing" that I am the King's kid, and if I am obedient to Him with all my life, and my finances and my ministries, then I will get a nice house, a good husband, good job, the clothes I want and yes the white picket fence too. (Okay, I am still hoping that God will bless me with a wonderful husband - but certainly not because I DESERVE it, but because God is gracious and loving.)
Let me clariry something before I go on. This is what God is speaking to me, and where God has brought me from a long time in searching for Him. And what do I say to all the answered prayers - people getting really nice stuff when they pray for it - yeah, God wants to make us happy, so sometimes He will give us the things that we think we really want and need, because He loves us. My question is - what do we REALLY want and need? Does God want me to own $200 pair of jeans? Fur coats? A couple of sports cars? Yeah, maybe God will give me those things (and He does give really nice things to people sometimes) BUT - we can't serve 2 masters. I think the more stuff we have, the more we upgrade wants into needs. (That's a bit of Descartes philosophy coming in there...sorry, I gotta). The more material possesions or assets, the harder it is to see Him more clearly.
The world is a messed up world. I am only scratching the surface to what's going on - to the things that I have been protected from my whole life. The great plague - AIDS: In 2000, 3 million people died of AIDS - 500,000 (1,400 PER DAY) of them were children. The sex trade: In 1990, ChildHOpe estimated that there were about 150,000 CHILD prositutes in the UNITED STATES. Child labour, bridal burnings, the poor - which are the MAJORITY of the earth's population. All of these things. Are world is so desperate. We need to open our eyes as the church, to see where we can be Jesus to the world. That's what Christians are, right? Little Christs (hence the name Christians).

I was hungry and you gave Me something to eat; I was thirsty and you gave Me drink. I was a stranger and you invited Me in; naked and you clothed Me; I was sick and you visited Me; I was in prison and you came to Me (Jesus, in Matthew 25:5-36).

Some other verses that have been stirring in me are...

Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust consume and where thieves break in and steal...No one can serve two masters;..You cannot serve God and riches. Matthew 6:10, 24

But the cares of the world and the lure of wealth, and the desire for other things come in and CHOKE the word, and it yields NOTHING. Mark 4:19

Yes, Jesus wants us happy. No, he doesn't want you to be miserable (which most people think they will be if they don't have all of the luxuries that 3/4 of the world only dream of). But, if you are willing, God can teach you a GREATER joy.

Chistianity is not glamourous. Jesus was not glamourous. He wasn't a celebrity with the coolest looking clothes and a prestigious music group following Him around. He wasn't given the front row seats at His synagogue (as far as I know!). Jesus was about touching the untouchables, loving the unloveables, showing grace. Living humbly, living simply.

My challenge is this - to think upon these things. I know that many, many, many of you probably get frustrated when reading this. (I know some of you are saying "she finally gets it!!!" hahaha). But I am just asking you to ask God what is best for your life. Where He is leading you. Where He is calling you. Who are you suppose to be Jesus to today, this week?

Just some thoughts...

This is a pic that I took with my friend's camera back in the fall...beautiful Montreal! 

Fajitas

I love guacamole. My sister knows this... I don't know how many others do too, but yes, I do love guacamole. That was the first thing that I learnt how to make since living on my own. I went to "The Three Amigos" this evening with Emilie and we have fajitas. Very delish.

It's funny... I had forgotten why I had started this whole blog ordeal, and as I was cleaning out my email account I ran across several emails, one in particular from my mentor's husband, while I was going through a really rough time around mid-October, encouraging me to journal. I have horrible hand writting (wonder where that comes from!...dad...) so this seemed logical. Anyway, that was just the genesis of this net-journal.

God is good. To be perfectly honest, I've been finding it hard to get back into a structured devo time. You can keep that in your prayers. It's always hard getting back into a routine. BUT - some really cool things that I heard about today are...

My prayer-walking mission may be expanding. I go to this monthly city-wide inter-denominational worship service ( www.heartquake.org )in which I sometimes sing with the worship group, and otherwise am the photographer for the event. Anyway, they will be announcing and inviting everyone to come and join me in my prayer-walking. Isn't that amazing? I am so excited. Pray that people will respond! PLUS they have asked me to lead a prayer for our city in the service this Friday. GOD is good and faithful indeed. I am so blessed to be a part of His family.

Love and prayers to all of you on this freezing day in Montreal!

from venting to hugs

Today was my first day of school for 2005. I really liked my first class - health psychology. The second one - behavioural neuroscience...not so much.
Here's something that really annoys me about certain professors. We get into class (there are 550 plus there)and he says "who out of you actually believes that there is something beyond just circuitry that makes the "I" in you?". Of course only a few brave souls (such as myself) put up there hands. But then, he goes even futher and asks "Explain to us why you believe this".
I hate how hauty reductionists who believe that everything just boils down to biology, and who are prepared for such a debate, intellectually challenge undergraduates, most of which are in their first year at university. I was going to put my hand up to say something, but I was sure that he had a quick comeback for anyone with a dualistic point of view (that the mind and body are two seperate entities). Grrr. Anyway... that was my beef.
Other than that - things are really great.
I watched Back to the Future 2 today. What a great movie. It's a classic. Entertaining, nice sequences, not a lot of cussing, and who doesn't love creative ideas of what the future might hold?
I love cath-ups. Saying goodbye can suck, but it's always fun to catch up. People that you see everyday, you don't necessarily hug (for example). When I got home, I got hugs. That was nice.

Love your neighbor

Happy New Year to all!
I had a wonderful New Years and had an especially wonderful New Years Day today. We had friends and family over and it was an amazing evening. We shared our goals, fears, prayers for each other, we worshiped, prayed, ate, laughed and yes, cried as well.
The Lord has challenged me. I was reading the famous passage "Love your neighbour as yourself" and it really hit me hard. Loving the people in your community, in your school, at work, at church the way you would love yourself, or your family or perhaps your closest friends.
God has challenged me to show more love to others. To love the unloveable, to touch the untouchables. He has called me to show warmth to those who are lonely. To invite people into my family (the family of God) where they can find peace, and acceptance. I want everyone to be able to experience what I experienced tonight. To be able to KNOW that they are loved, that they are important, that they are accepted, that they are cherished, and that they are friends of God.
I hope and pray that I will be able to really love my neighbours in a new way. I am known for being a "feeler". I pray that I can use this gift from God to really reach out and make a difference. That I can have my eyes wide open to where God is moving and join Him.
I love Jesus. I really do. If you don't - I pray that you will soon, because His love is amazing.