Hangin' with the rents

My folks are here for a nice little visit, and it's the first time that I have been visited by them since living on my own in Montreal. It's cool...and yet very strange at the same time.
They took me grocery shopping last night (something that I always took for granted) and my dad literally was as jubilant as a child because he got to put a can through the machine to get 5 cents. I never knew that Ontarians couldn't do that. Anyway, I couldn't believe he was so excited - for 5 cents! Good times.
We went to visit my old neighbourhood. I love how much my parents love people. We went to a bakery and my dad was joking around with the guy. "I know a great place where we can get trail mix!" he says with a sparkle in his eye as we head to another store in the area. Just a few years back my dad started doing the grocery shopping for the family. He would always share the SUPER DEALS that he found. I forgot about that. The one christmas when he got special cheese and to his surprise when he opened it up, exclaimed "2 layers!!!!!" Hahahaha...for those of us who were there, we know why it was funny.
My mom walked me to work this morning. I have never been walked to work. It was nice. The sun was rising and I had someone to talk to. It's nice that they are here.
I've been listening to this new band Sigur Ros. Sigur Ros is like a hot bath that melts me as wax melts off a candle. My dad last year used to eat breakfast by candlelight. He said it brought him peace to start off his day. I have been listening to some cool music that has been calming me down some. Some new favs include 'Iron & Wine', 'Nick Drake', 'Copeland', 'the Decemberists', and of course 'Sigur Ros'. I look back at the music I used to really love - punk and hardcore. I can't listen to it for very long at all anymore. There's this band, x Disciple x, and they are from the hardcore scene. I remember worshipping to it (Christian band - don't get freaked out). I think it's strange how God works in different ways at different times of our lives.
I was a head counselor at a day camp and this 4 year old girl asked me one day "Why doesn't God speak to us out loud?" to which I replied "Because he's so much more creative".


Oh yes, and about my hubby...
In my last blog I said that I was praying a lot for my hubby. I did not run off and get married while I was in the U.K. No worries. I am praying for my husband, whom I do not know. I write cute love notes (not high school cute, but they are for him to read later and you cannot know what is in them!) and pray for him everynight. Sometimes I sense in my spirit that he is going through good times/bad times. I guess I'll never know if that's the Holy Spirit leading me to pray specifically for something, or if it's just my wild imagination...but I will take the former, and use it as an act of faith and surrender. So to my hubby (whoever, and wherever you are) I love you, and I pray that you are growing and being strengthened by the Spirit right now. Bless you! See you soon (hopefully - hahaha).

Praise is what I do when I want to be close to You

Today is a good day. The Lord is MIGHTY in strength and He is shaking things up.
I was really stirred up today, and ready to go out into the battlefield with a small army to declare war against the enemy in the streets of Montreal. I was ready to lead the troops...
Nobody showed up. Not one person.
It was sooooooooo easy to get down.
But...I didn't.
I went upstairs and called a friend, and we prayed on the phone for almost an hour. It wasn't the same as walking through the streets, but I am walking by faith and not by sight. I am waiting on the Lord. I know that He is rising up His leaders in Montreal, and you can agree with me in prayer for that.
Praise the LORD! Hallelujah
Join me in prayer:
We praise your name, Jesus, for it is your desire to see Montreal be completely transformed. We give this city to You. Lord, we pray in agreement for the saints of Montreal to rise up in strength and power. We pray that they will be filled with confidence and that they will each have the strength of ten men. Lord, we call out the labourers of Montreal to join in this vision. We pray that you will send more people. Let us fall to our knees in prayer for this city! Help us to surrender to you. Lord we pray for Your eyes, to see the people in this city with compassion. Fill us anew we pray. Lord - light the fire again!!!
I have been praying a lot this week in French and in Spanish. I don't know why exactly, it's just what my spirit has been leading me to do. I've been praying a lot for my hubby too...don't know why. Maybe he's going through a rough time right now. Who knows?
If you are reading this and feel lonely right now - I have a message for you. I was praying today and God gave me a message for those who are particularily struggling with loneliness -- The Lord says "I will NEVER leave you. I will NEVER leave you. My grip on you will not loosen". I know it seems simple, but I really felt that some people may say that but their hearts aren't penetrated with the truth of it. I was interceding and i kept saying that sentence over and over and over and over again. So if this is for you, I encourage you to say that again and again until you are convinced of it's truth. Cool? Let me know if this helps. Peace and Love my friends
KiR xox

this is going to get a bit political...

I heard a famous Canadian Ethicist speak on Tuesday about Ethics (obviously) and she said something that haunted my thoughts ever since, so I have to throw it out on the table...
In Canada, it is legal to have an abortion up until the day before the baby is to be delivered. Now clearly late in the third trimester there must be reasons given etc. But still, the fact that babies are being aborted, legally in our country and regularily in the second and even third trimester makes me sick to my stomach. I know that most people in churches keep quiet about this sort of thing, because they don't want to be associated in any way with those crazy people who have screamed at people going into abortion clinics and call them sinners etc. I definately agree that Christ would NEVER do that...but I do believe that we can be voices for those who can't speak up. I believe that we can have an impact on the country. I don't know much about changing laws, but I feel stirred up.
We as Canadians pride ourselves on being such a peaceful country. Yet, whether it be killing with machine guns, or under the knife...does it make a difference in the eyes of the Creator??? As a Canadian, I don't want to have to live with the blood on my hands for the sins of this land.
I realize that this is probably quite controversial to be posting so publicly for all to see. But how is it that so many Christians are so quiet about the issue. If we don't want to fall into the category of those "Crazy hating Christians" why don't we stand up, show them love, be Christians and take care, rather than walk by or ignore the issue.
Mother Terressa said once, when asked about the issue of abortion "Bring them to me, and I will take them."
Who will stand up and be so bold?
My mom told me once that the doctors advised her to abort her child when she was pregnant with Joel. I can't imagine my life without Joel. He's my older brother and he has taught me so much in life. I know that he has been an inspiration to so many. He is a leader. An artist. A passionate man of God. The world would have been at a great loss without him. Praise Jesus that my mom didn't take her doctor's advice. But it breaks my heart for all of those "Joels" that have been silenced from eternity.

things on my mind

Blue like Jazz. You should read it. My big bro gave it to me upon turning 22 and I read it in one sitting. I keep taking it out and reading quotes to people who stop by my place. I am a walking spokesman, but it's like when you find a really good deal on something, you want to share it with others. Donald Miller is so candid and clever with his words. He speaks so many truths that are too often left unsaid.
Here's just one quote
"I used to get really ticked about preachers who talked too much about grace, because they tempted me to not be disciplined...I believed if word got out about grace, the whole church was going to trun into a brothel." (page 79) "Rick tells me, looking back, that he was too proud to receive free grace from God...Though he understood that God wanted nothing in return, his mind could not communicate this fact to his heart, so his life was something like torture...it seemed wrong for me not to have to pay for my sin, not to feel guilty about it or kick myself around...I wanted to feel as though I earned my forgiveness." (page 83)
Holy cow...I see myself in so many pages of this book.
I need grace, and I need to repent of my pride. Everytime that i delay asking for forgiveness because I want to scream at myself and sit myself in the hot seat being lectured in my own mind. But what the heck, God doesn't want me to do that. He would rather have his kid killed than have me pay the price for my sins...think about that!
So today, I receive free grace and man do I need it. When we are secured by grace, it gives us freedom to fail. I need to learn that. God is much more concerned with my character than he is my comfort, my resume, my report card. He is changing me, refining me, rebuilding, restoring me. In the larger scheme of things, the bigger picture, I know that God DOES work through ALL things for the good of those he loves. I embrace his grace today. For it is what makes the air sweet, and puts the smile on my face. My redeemer LIVES.
If ever I loved thee, my Jesus, tis now

sometimes life just gives you lemons

So here's the thing. I'm going to get honest. I am not doing well in school this semester. And another fact about me - I don't deal with failure very well at all. It's just one of those things. And I need to share that my flesh is SO desiring to give into the temptation to start worrying, being irrational...jumping to conclusions...
So here's my weakness - out on the table for all to see. I believe that there is POWER in vulnerability (I told someone this morning that I was going to write a book about that one day...).
Please agree with me in prayer against the spirit of failure. Help me to really believe and know in my heart that the Lord will work through ALL things. That He will provide a way where there seems to be know way. That I would really be wise, and that I would be able to comprehend and retain the information for my courses. Here are some specific prayer targets if it helps. Thanks in advance!
Coming up -
Existentialism paper on Simone de Beauvoir on Wednesday
Genes & Behaviour paper due the 30th on O.C.D. (this is a biggie - scary!)
Tutoring for my statistics class (I REALLY need to get a good grade on the final)

first time blogger

So this is my first blog
Let me give you a glimpse into my life at present
I am here in Montreal and loving it. The city is gorgeous and the people are warm. I love that I go to work and speak french. It's one of those things that you secretly think you are cool because you do it. Making cappucinos and lattes while laying on a thick Quebec french accent. Ha!
Philosophy and Psychology are my school projects. Existentialism is quite interesting. Not as messed up as I thought it would be. Heideger, Satre, de Beauvoir ... I am definately not the smartest in my class, but I feel like I am thinking more outside the box now, which is cool.
I love my classes (most of them) but I have yet found a great studying technique. I am an organizer. I can colour co-ordinate my highlights from class to my study cards at home, make thousands of charts, dividing up sections of work into nice compact units so that I can be efficient while studying. All the time organizing and never actually doing it.
I sit and i procrastinate....in my mind this seems like the most important thing to do, and i must NOT in any way alter my goal of procrastinating, or perhaps the world will come crashing down all around me.
Many little things in life amuse me. For instance. I was so clever to make a special cleaning chart to put up in my apartment of all the things that need to be cleaned and a space to sign your name and the date to keep track of how the place is keeping tidy. I love how I've lived here for two and a half months and the chart is still completely empty.

... just some k thoughts ...