Peace, activism and all the in between stuff

So it's been a while. I realize that my last blog was left with a bit of a downer, so for those hanging by my last post, do not fret - I am doing just fine!
Here are some things that I have been thinking about lately

Peace & Stillness
We've been going through a really interesting season here at the War College. A lot of peace and stillness and waiting on God. We have gone through prayer times of 2 hours (as a group) just listening to God (no spoken prayer or songs). Many of us have gone on word fasts for three days etc. It's definately an interesting change of pace. It wasn't really brought upon us, it's just something that everyone started doing. God has been stretching me to be a better listener as well.
I was sharing with a good friend, Tara, how when you are in a really good relationship, you can tolerate, or even welcome 'awkward silences'. Sitting and being still with God for hours on end made me feel really awkward. I wanted Him to talk to me, but He's just been wanting to BE with me. I want to grow in my love for Him so that I can be comfortable with the silences.

Activism
For something completely different... I am trying to read up on some different leaders in the salvation army, in the church, and in the world. I want to grow in wisdom and see how they acted, what their tactics were and how they brought about change.
For a lot of my life I have been a coward, and almost paralized by fear of what other may think.
Something is stirring in me to rise up and be more aggressive. Now before everyone jumps the gun, I don't mean being an insensitive crazy, untamable ball of fire going out and screaming or throwing paint on fur coats (but come to think about it... joking). But, for example, I was going on a prayer walk with Olivia and I saw this really graphic porn floating in a puddle. Something rose up within me and I picked it up and shredded it. I keep finding stuff like that. Also when people ask me to go back to their rooms with them or try to sell me rock or ask me if I have a rig, I am starting to get a bit more aggressive in the way that I respond. I don't know if I am explaining this in the right way. I am not being rude, but learning how to stand up for what I think is right.

Stuff in between -
So peace & stillness, activism/aggression, and then there's relationship. I have been making some really cool friends here in the Downtown Eastside. Hanging out at our coffee shop that our corps (church) runs, and meeting some regulars, inviting them to cell group, taking them to coffee, visiting them in their rooms to chat, going with them on errands etc. it has really been a great experience. I've never really had anything like this in my life before. Of course, there are a lot of frustrations that come up, living in a place like this.
I met a woman named Laura, who is in her 50's and she was hooked on heroin back in the day, but now enjoys government paid methadone (which is more addictive, and a way that the government keeps drug addicts in this location. I digress...) and we were going to go to lunch together at this women's shelter, but she stood me up. I am not mad or bitter or anything like that. But it's just sad, and at times hard, to befriend and love people who are so inconsistent. I realize that this is obviously an effect of the living conditions etc etc etc, but just some thoughts.

Love you all! My dear friends, family, and others. Blessings to each and everyone of you.
Next time I write I'll share with you about what happend on Saturday - really great times. Muah!
Kir xox